brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Are we still banned from the library?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
My life is pants optional.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
