How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize