I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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