wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
