All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize