bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I just found puke in my bra..
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize