She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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