# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
