Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
