I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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