all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
