Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
