Only a mothe r could love this liver
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
