he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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