just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize