why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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