Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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