Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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