Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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