is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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