My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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