I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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