Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
