Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
