Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
