Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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