But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
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