Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
This show inspires me to have sex in space
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
