So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
