Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
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Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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