At least make sure they are 18
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.