Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Pooping to opera.
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