I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I wish there were birth control emojis
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
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