in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
and she was petting her beer can
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
