Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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