is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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