Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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