he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize