I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
