what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
