Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(646): View more from New York

How is your vagina???

(941): View more from Florida

Double booked

(646): View more from New York

With your butt?

(941): View more from Florida

Totes, candlesticks and all

(646): View more from New York

Yay!!

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(646): How is your vagina??? (941): Double booked (646): With your butt? (941): Totes, candlesticks and all (646): Yay!! http://tfl.nu/9v3z

Replies (4) Good night (1942) Bad night (752)
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(540): View more from Virginia

The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace

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(540): The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace http://tfl.nu/i9ng

Replies (21) Good night (6469) Bad night (702)
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(845): View more from New York

he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.

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(845): he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex. http://tfl.nu/a138

Replies (60) Good night (2225) Bad night (7589)
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(770): View more from Georgia

"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.

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(770): "Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea. http://tfl.nu/i0ux

Replies (10) Good night (2966) Bad night (1195)
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(713): View more from Texas

Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?

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(713): Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order? http://tfl.nu/nfxj

Replies (2) Good night (2766) Bad night (944)
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(813): View more from Florida

So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3

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(813): So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3 http://tfl.nu/7or4

Replies (4) Good night (4524) Bad night (1090)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?

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(248): Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet? http://tfl.nu/so9l

Replies (9) Good night (2146) Bad night (1757)
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(720): View more from Colorado

I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony

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(720): I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony http://tfl.nu/iwpl

Replies (6) Good night (897) Bad night (1556)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.

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(306): Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me. http://tfl.nu/vlc7

Replies (2) Good night (2179) Bad night (677)
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(540): View more from Virginia

my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.

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(540): my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened. http://tfl.nu/bhgb

Replies (47) Good night (1991) Bad night (625)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.

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(715): Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day. http://tfl.nu/c6jk

Replies (11) Good night (2009) Bad night (552)
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(916): View more from California

I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?

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(916): I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die? http://tfl.nu/yj8c

Replies (11) Good night (1405) Bad night (430)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.

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(304): Malt liquor mondays...better in theory. http://tfl.nu/6cjj

Replies (2) Good night (773) Bad night (553)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??

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(610): So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night?? http://tfl.nu/qtcd

Replies (2) Good night (876) Bad night (314)
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(314): View more from Missouri

When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.

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(314): When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor. http://tfl.nu/ygxz

Replies (5) Good night (766) Bad night (220)

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