Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
