She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
