I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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