White coat. Heels.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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