Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
