with your own penis?
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't