whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
