We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
