trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
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